Thursday, June 30, 2011

The Wipey Awards!

Make sure you look for me on Wipeout Canada again this Sunday. TVtropolis at 8:00 pm. I've got a really good chance at winning the Wipey Award for "Best Raging Psychopath."

Saturday, June 18, 2011

More attached to them than he is, huh?

I'm more attached to "them" than he is? I doubt that very much.
This ad was clearly written by a woman.

Sunday, June 12, 2011

14th Annual Mudcat Festival Strongman Contest

Dunnville, Ontario
June 11, 2011

I weighed in at 178 which put me in the lightweight class. That made it a pretty easy victory for me but that's okay. First place is first place and that trophy will look good on my shelf with all the rest of them. Nothing is easy, really. Not when you consider that no matter how heavy or light something is you still have to lift it more times than anybody else or move it faster than anybody else. I've done almost nothing but what the Internet considers endurance work all year so I think I did fairly well.
I've been way more focused on the Warrior Dash than I was on this contest anyway. Mostly because I've already paid for my spot in the Warrior Dash and it's non-refundable and more expensive but also because it's not like anything else I've ever trained for.

Monday, June 6, 2011

Why is it every time you run somewhere some turd has to shout "Run, Forest, run!"?

First of all, "Run, Forest, run" shows a complete lack of creativity. That was a popular movie and everybody's seen it so the joke is pretty played out.

Second, who's fault is it that any of these dummies can't use their legs for anything other than waddling from one seat to another? There's nobody forcing any of them to stay out of shape. If, after high school, you decided "I'm going to sit on my ass and smoke weed for the next two decades," you've got no one to blame for yourself. Have fun with your video games and keep your lame criticisms of anyone who goes outside for anything other than a cigarette break to yourselves.

Also, the online subculture of "athletes" who don't actually play any sports and are afraid to even so much as run for a bus because it will hinder their precious strength gains. Wow, you guys are pussies.

Man, it's so funny because it was in a movie. Pop culture is hilarious because it makes me feel smart!

Friday, June 3, 2011

The new Snickers commercial with Joe Pesci in it is funny.

Anyone who doesn't think Joe Pesci is hilarious is obviously mentally unstable and should be slapped into conformity. You might be tempted to disagree... Well, fucking slap yourself, retard!

"What do you model, gloves?"

Manny Pacquaio in his prime could beat up Bruce Lee in his prime.

This video is just of him training. Never mind that he's gotten rich knocking people out.

Knocking a man out > knocking a man backwards so that he trips over a chair.