Saturday, April 2, 2011

Workout stuff I recommend


Keg Conditioning by Dave Lemanczyk. This method is so simple it's retard-proof. It's my favourite of the bunch. Brutally effective and the best deal you'll find for your money. If you don't get results from this it's because you suck at working out. Go watch some more TV, lardass.
Rock Iron Steel by Steve Justa. It pays to be resourceful and Steve Justa is just that. When it comes to working out, whining about what you don't have or what you can 't do is for goofs. Are you a goof? You should be able to use any tool at your disposal to get stronger.

Solitary Fitness by Charles Bronson. This is actually an all-around health and fitness guide along the lines of any of those old mail-order physical culture courses, only a lot less gay. Not only that, it's fucking hilarious too.
"I think fat people should actually be shot -- they are repulsive to look at. If your pet dog got so fat, you might have to have it put down for health reasons. Do your sit-ups, you lazy bastard!"
Fucking awesome.

Infinite Intensity by Ross Enamait. If you're like me and you like simple and effective workouts then this book is great. If you're like everybody else and a bit of a mongoloid who needs every single aspect of this shit explained to you and all the reasons why it works with a whole bunch of names of Russian scientists you otherwise never would have heard of dropped as if that makes the whole philosophy so much more authentic, then this book is for you too. The perfect blend of straight-to-the-point physical effort and mind-numbing scientific mumbo jumbo.

I get asked a lot what books I recommend reading when it comes to working out. I've read a lot of them but most are just half-assed copies of each other. Very few actually stick out in my mind for any reason. Most of them actually kind of suck. Some retards can't read enough about this shit. They'll buy book after book and spend a fortune on a library of crap with the pathetic attitude that if they learn at least one thing from each one then it was totally worth it...


BWAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!

If that's what you think then you're a tool.

Sooner or later you need to stop reading and start doing. Eventually it will hit you how simple it all really is. The more effort you put into your workouts the better you get at working out. The more effort you put into recovering from said workouts, the better you get at recovering, the sooner you can work out again and the faster you get the results.

5 comments:

  1. Although he's a bit of a "cash cow" type and has released more manuals than most people have had sexual encounters, Bud Jeffries' Twisted Conditioning 1 and 2 are awesome manuals. They're nice, simple, and although they're long winded the meat of the information is exceedingly easy to get through. And, even being a fat bastard he's managed to kick most strength training "authorities" in the balls over the assumption that you can't do conditioning and strength or even do one and still possess any modicum of the other (having done 2,000+ bodyweight squats while obese and now, 2,000+ swings with a kettlebell and handstand pushups for reps after losing something like 150 pounds).

    Just my two cents.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I interviewed Bud Jeffries for my college newspaper more than 10 years ago. Unfortunately the article never made it to print. If I can find it I might put it on this blog.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I recently moved to a new city and I don't know any good gyms yet so I joined a cheap 24 hour chrome-and-fern to tide me over.

    I went there for the first time yesterday and the dumbbells only go up to 30kg... I start warming up with dumbbell snatches and practically everyone else in the pathetic freeweights section starts looking at me out the corner of their eye in the mirror or flat out staring. I heard one kid laughing. Don't know who it was, probably one of the runts doing 10kg bicep curls.

    There's only one squat rack with a single oly bar and about 160kg of plates. You have to wait for the geeks to finish doing their 5kg lateral raises in it first.

    A good illustration of the philosophy of these kind of places is this: they have a dip machine with a kneeling pad that helps you do goddamn dips that must have cost thousands. They don't have a normal dip station for people that can do dips which would cost about £120.

    Enjoying the blog.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Kieran, try gymwatch and powerlifting watch. Gymwatch has gyms in most of the world on file, so you might be able to find something good.

    ReplyDelete